Someone loved me and asked me to help forward a microblog. I went to see it and didn't understand it. Asked, give me a link. I opened it. It's the wrong page and gave me another link. It's a microblog. This time, I understand what's going on a little, but I don't have detailed information.
The original microblog is a very good article, quoting classics, wanton and brilliant. I can vaguely feel the connection between things, but it's not clear. It makes me spend too much time to verify, and I don't think it's worth it. Therefore, after confirming the basic facts, I'll help first.
But this case is a little special. More often, I may not help.
Because I don't know what's going on.
I've met a lot of help, some help and some don't.
I have also asked for help from many people, some of whom have been helped and some have not been helped.
I have also summed up the reasons for not being helped. For example, it is a kind of light talk and useless to others. For example, the thing you ask for is different from the other party's style and is not easy to sell. This is also a kind of.
I think the key reason for being helped or not is nothing more than this:

1. Politeness
   Ask for help and keep a low profile. That's for sure. So when I write an email, I am usually very polite. "Please", "can you" and "sincere please" are commonly used words. At the end, it is usually "Shun song Chunqi" (replaced by season). It may not be important for the other party to understand this ancient etiquette on the autumn water. The important thing is to feel my sincere attitude.
   Politeness comes from sincerity, and etiquette focuses on details. When someone asks me for help, he calls me "Miss Xiao". Although my surname is not Xiao, it is not professional to change someone's surname anyway.
   It's also a matter of politeness to thank others whether they help or not. No one covets that thanks, but it represents a person's quality.
2. Professional
   The above-mentioned change of surname is one of them. If the content of help is vague, it will not only make others feel unable to start, but also make others feel that this person is unprofessional and unreliable - although immature will lead to a lot of help, helping others depends on whether they are professional or not, because such a person may help more and more, and eventually trap the person who helps. Moreover, because they are not professional, many times, such people will be dependent. For example, if you give a resume and you give advice, in the end, they may ask you to change it directly. You propose to make a PPT to explain, but he can't do it. In the end, he wants you to do it.
   No one wants to help. It's a hot thing.
   To ask others for help, use short and clear sentences to describe what it is, why they need help and how they need help. It's best to do the preparatory work in place, so that others can measure whether they want to help in a short time, rather than others need to check a lot of data to be sure, and many people will not be willing to check the data. In particular, some backgrounds are clear to yourself and others are not, and you can't ask others to be as clear as you.
3. Time management
   In fact, time management in helping is inseparable from politeness and professionalism.
   It's not even late, but it's not good to be here. I met a friend who urgently asked me to help the introducer. I was also very attentive. I made an appointment early. When it was time, I went by myself. The friend I made an appointment to introduce went, but the initiator didn't arrive. I called and asked, saying that I had a cold early in the morning and couldn't get out. This makes people can't help but be angry. If they catch a cold early in the morning, they can call off early in the morning. When everyone else arrives, it's too late to apologize. I treated my friend to two consecutive meals before I finished the matter. As for the friend who asked me for help, I dare not treat him as a friend again.
   Another misunderstanding of time management is: put your own affairs first, no matter what others are busy with, ask and urge.
4. Utility
   When using people, be enthusiastic. When you don't need people, you are cold. Such a person, can help once, dare not help a second time.
   Someone once asked me a question and I answered it, but the other party didn't reply. After a period of time, I saw someone transfer his microblog. My intuition was that this person had cancelled his attention to me. I looked at it and sure enough. Maybe my answer didn't satisfy him, but I answered it seriously and responsibly - I can't recognize people offline, but I will have a deep memory of digital ID, but now I really forget who this person is. I only remember this thing. It can be used as a case, because there is enlightenment, people can forget, because it's not important.
5. Bring trouble to others
   The person who makes the request is often simple, just speak, but the person who helps often needs to take action. For example, how to get from a to B? How long might it take? Everyone will measure the input-output ratio. If I need to spend four or five hours to go back and forth between the two cities in order to help, I really can't do it. The toll is a small thing. I want to measure the effect of these hours in other places.
6. Small profit inducement
   For example, you may have read too much influence, so you think it's a skill, but you ignore it: no one lacks a meal. Eating with a clear purpose without emotional foundation will make people vigilant. The so-called soft mouth of others. If you don't want to help at all, it's better to refuse directly, not to mention that eating takes time. For many people, time is more valuable than food - it's snobbish to say that, but time and money can be compared.
   Conversely, there are situations where you never know how to pay for a meal. I once had dinner with a child for several times. I paid the bill every time. The only time I said I wanted to invite a guest, I ordered and was complained by the other party that this was not delicious and that was not delicious. In order to avoid having another chance to eat together in the future, I hurried to pay the bill. I'm older and earn more than children. It's normal to pay, but I also want to avoid others' dependence on me.
7. Make progress
   I think this factor is very critical, that is, whether this person is worth helping or not.
   An aspiring person, the person who helps him doesn't want to get any help from him. It may also be out of the feedback to the society. Everyone is happy to see aspiring young people. This is the hope of the world. Such a person makes people willing to lose money, time and energy to help, like pay it forward.
   Some people seem modest. In fact, they can't listen to other people's opinions. They get angry when they say a few words and refute them in a modest tone. For such people, what they want is praise and encouragement. They can't give opinions. If they give opinions, they may get disgusted with their good intentions.
   This is the truth that Buddha is destined for people.
   Many people help me. I think it's also because I'm a self-motivated person who knows progress, knows discretion, is positive and enthusiastic, and so are many people I help. Most of the people who have helped forget to help, but I believe they will understand my goodwill and help more people. This is a divergence of transmission, light and heat.