Hi, I’m Pineapple Steves, and this is the story of my first NFT that led me to become the unofficial cosmic travel guide for the masses. 

It Started IRL 

In May 2021, I walked into a local shop I knew nothing about. Good vibes emanated from the ivy-covered storefront and the friendly font on the window beckoned my wife and me inside.  

We were greeted by the incredibly kind and humble, HeyTVM. He showed us around and even gave us a sneak peek at his behind-the-shop oasis. It was a garden of sorts, and it oozed creative feng shui (or maybe that was the neon lights on the side of the building, idk).  

After a while, HeyTVM brought up that he was currently trying to figure out NFTs. Bingo. 

I didn’t know much, but I did know that his style made sense in the space. If Bored Apes could become a phenomenon, his skeletons could too.  

He told my wife, an abstract artist, about a studio space he’d heard of, and we said our goodbyes. My wife would eventually move into that studio for a time, so shoutout to the big homie himself for putting her onto it. 

I Missed The Mint -_- 

I don’t have many regrets in life. Missing out on a free Nah Fungible Bone is one of them.  

It was some random Monday in September, and I knew it was happening. But because of my laziness, I didn’t learn how to connect a wallet (oof). I drank a beer with my buddy and shot the shit instead.  

Well. Shit.  

I could’ve minted an OG Rare for all I know.  

OK, I’LL BITE, wHaT’s An NfT?

I didn’t want to be a meme. But here I am. 

Publishing a blog as an NFT on a Web3 application and getting most of my paycheck (yeah, I still have an IRL job – for now) in cryptocurrencies. 

Shoutout out to Bankless for putting me on to OnJuno. 

It all happened so quickly. One second I was like, yo, “this is dumb”. Then, WHAM! I’m spending copious amounts of time on Twitter and Discord trying to figure out what in the actual fuck is an NFT and how I could potentially make money off them.  

Fortunately for me, I stumbled on a ragtag group of boneheads who were gracious enough to guide a newb like me.  

After a few days of conversing with the bones community, I was sold. 

I transferred all my Ethereum I accrued from my Blockfi account and bought what became my pseudonym for life - Pineapple Steves. 

I didn’t know that I’d become a cosmic travel guide at the time. I just thought the Pineapple PFP (profile pic for the uninitiated) was superior. 

TF is an Unofficial Cosmic Travel Guide? 

I’m glad you asked.  

My self-imposed role will attempt to catalog and explain the awesomeness of the current quest the NFB fam is on.  

It’ll be part of Rick Steves parody and part newbie guide to NFTs.  

I won't be spewing technical info about zkRollups or counterfactual wallets. Just straight up, easy to understand musings and philosophies along with commentary on the NFB chillgramage.

As for the unofficial part, well, let’s just say I didn’t run this by Hey TVM and the team. So, I am working off the same info that you can find anywhere on the internet. No secrets up my sleeve or anything like that. Maybe someday I’ll become official. But because I’m not a presumptuous fella, and I also prefer to be honest, for now, I am unofficial.

Are You Qualified? 

No. Not at all. 

Unlike the real Rick Steves, I have no real experience as a cosmic travel guide. I only know about our recent stops just because I went along for the ride.  

Don’t take anything I say as gospel. Do your research (DYOR). And for the love of God, don’t spend more money than you can afford to lose.  

But, I do have a background in breaking down complex ideas so they are easy to understand. 

And that’s where this blog (or whatever the hell this is) offers value.  

If you’re confused about this whacky space and want to learn without feeling like you’re an idiot, this is the place for you.   

Are You Just Shilling? Also, WTF is Shilling? 

If you don’t know, shilling is the modern-day equivalent of selling snake oil. 

Usually, the shilling is equated to scammy projects and utter bullshit. So, no I’m not a shill, and I'm not shilling anything.

I’m just here dude. 

Just catching vibes.

Do I have a vested interest in those vibes? Yep. 

But I wouldn’t call this blog (or whatever the hell this is) shilling. I’m not telling you to buy anything. I’m simply providing my commentary as we fly through the universe on our cosmic chillgramage. 

Wen Moon? 

Bruh, I got into NFTs because I like art. No cap. 

You might think I’m lyin, but the idea of a world where creative folks can make a living off the work they want to do is a world that I want to live in. 

Every time I acquire a piece, I purchase it with the artist in mind or I buy it just because I think it’ll look cool in a virtual gallery. 

So, with that preface, don’t ask “wen moon”. Just go on and move to the next writer promising to have an inside scoop on the next big project.  

You wouldn’t go to Rick Steves for investing advice. Don’t ask me, Pineapple Steves, for financial advice, either. 

Wat Next? 

I'll be rolling out my first parody guides to previous NFB destinations shortly. And probably include a quick start guide of sorts to help people understand the awesomeness.  

Stay tuned and remain chill until…