(Re)Introducing the Legendary Trio. What really happened at the Alpha Hub? - by thade.
Three mysterious entities..
Three mysterious entities were found snooping around the PrimapesDAO Alpha Hub. Security didn’t think much of it because ever since the floor price rose, the Alpha Hub has been gaining a lot of attention. We thought they were friendly, but these three mysterious Nutopians kept pestering Primapes as they headed to the bridge to ██████. Some Primapes said they kept asking how to get inside of the Alpha Hub. The trio didn’t seem to like when they heard that only Primapes are allowed in the Alpha Hub. What happened the next day took the Primapes by surprise.
Primapes #981, #993, and #1003 were found near the ██████ bridge, beaten up and buried under piles of shitcoins and hidden-folder NFTs. Security rolled back the tapes only to find out the mysterious trio were no strangers to the Primapes.
The Legendary Trio
The trio made it into the Alpha Hub after stealing keys from a few Primapes. We set off the alarms and let the rest of the Primapes know we’ve got some intruders. They seemed to be after one thing… our Keynanas.
How did they know exactly where to go to find our Keynana stash? We were saving those for a special event. We caught the thieves on security cam leaving the Alpha Hub with all of our Keynanas. Those damn apes… we’ve identified them.
DystoPunk AKA “Dysto” ⚡️
The first thief was identified as Dysto. Dysto is a well known degen from Greystone City. Dysto was born in Nutopia but moved to Greystone when he was a child. Him and his family got out of Nutopia when his father was found stealing funds from the PrimapesDAO treasury and gambling it all away in Pepe’s Game.
Dysto lived his whole adult life in Greystone City before being exiled for stealing and scamming. This lead us to believe he was meticulously chosen to infiltrate our Alpha Hub.
Primabot 🤖
Thought by Primapes to be AI, Primabot moderates the Alpha Hub from a hidden location outside of Nutopia. Not much is known about Primabot other than the fact it manages all systems inside of the Alpha Hub. Primabot knows the ins and outs of the Alpha Hub and all of it’s inhabitants.
The other thieves must've swindled or hacked it to gain access to the Alpha Hub and find our Keynanas.
Skardsen 😈
Skardsen was the last of the trio identified and seems to be the ringleader. His name is an anagram of "darkness". Skardsen used to be an alpha caller in the Alpha Hub. Once loved and respected by many, he let the clout get to his head. When the bear market came and his calls started underperforming, his following dwindled. Realizing his portfolio was in shambles and the morale of the Alpha Hub at an all-time low, he started shilling any and everything to extract any liquidity left.
He was kicked out of the Alpha Hub for shilling pump and dumps, and using other Primapes as exit liquidity. Nobody knows exactly where he went, but after losing most of his net worth in LUNA, UST, and FTX, he’s come back for revenge.
We need your help…
PrimapesDAO is asking you for your help retrieving our Keynanas. We have no idea where they went but they have to be close, somewhere in Nutopia. Word on the street is they’re trying to sell our Keynanas in an effort to raise funds and start their own campaign.
You might be wondering, what are Keynanas and why are they so important to us? They were meant to be kept secret and available only to Primapes. Now that the thieves have stolen them, we’re afraid the true utility of our Keynanas will inevitably be leaked.
We must get back our ‘nanas, even if it means buying them back from them. This is where we ask for your help. You will be rewarded.
