I have learned a lot this year. This is a mind dump of all those lessons. Some of the lessons I’m learning are still in progress. I expect to look back on this in some number of years and scoff at some and smile at others.

For context, if you the reader don’t know me, this year marks a pivotal moment in my life. I became a father. Fatherhood has taught me more than I may yet realize.

Having a kid allows you to truly appreciate childhood. Everything your kid does is awesome because it’s your first time committing “firsts” to episodic memory. Those firsts are amazing. Life changing. The first time my son called me “dada” is a memory I never want to lose. I can still hear it. I can still picture the moment.

I don’t remember the first time I fell in love with a song, but I was able to watch my son do exactly that multiple times this year. I get to watch him learn what art is, what love is, what it feels like to walk, to run, to learn the twist endings of the greatest movies of all time. I get to witness /childhood/.

But here’s the real kicker? It’s not about me. Christmas isn’t about me anymore. Halloween isn’t about me. There’s a kid trying to have a childhood right now and that’s a sacred, special time. Two years ago I would have been scared by that. Today? I think that it’s the entire point.

It’s funny because the few times I’ve told people that they’re like “yeah… you didn’t know?”. But reassembling this core belief has been powerful for me. I’m a positive person. I’m social, I’m friendly, I look on the bright side, and I see the potential.

However, positive thinking is garbage. You can’t manifest anything by thinking. Your thoughts are a second-order effect of your beliefs. That is where most of your time should be spent. If you have a broken belief about yourself or the world you can spend all the time in the world watering your thoughts, but they’re still coming from useless soil. Nothing will grow.

Patience doesn’t mean being content with your circumstances, it means being content with being uncomfortable with your circumstances and staying the course. Until this year I’ve always feared not being patient and often wondered if I wasn’t. I get bored and uncomfortable if I’m not actively growing or trying something new. Does that mean I’m impatient?

No. Impatience would be jumping ship the second I feel that discomfort. Patience is knowing what needs to be done and putting your head down to do it. It doesn’t mean you don’t stand up for yourself or you settle, and it definitely doesn’t mean you become complacent. That’s something I have no patience for.

Why do we do what we do? Why work? Why does Jeff Bezos keep running Amazon? Why would Elon buy Twitter? Beyond obvious or cynical interpretations of money and power, I honestly think they have learned that doing stuff is fun. The challenge is fun and interesting. They’re intellectually stimulated. It’s a game.

A game with a bad game loop isn’t worth playing. I’m reminded of the Japanese concept of Ikigai. Ikigai is the thing you’re called to do. It sits at the center of what you’re good at, what you love, what the world needs, and what you can be paid for. Finding that center point makes the game worth playing.

The game analogy is powerful for me as a creative. You don’t play a game just to see the end credits or to see your rank go up. You play because the journey is worthwhile. You gain something from it. The game is fun because it has a set of rules and takes those rules seriously. It passes time in a way that’s interesting, challenging, stimulating, or something similar. It does something for you.

This is also why I play guitar and write music. This is why I design. This is why I like early-stage startups. Not just because the end result is something I can be proud of, but more so because the process is stimulating. Because I can reach a flow state seamlessly while doing it. Because I’m good at it. Because it’s fun.

There have been times in my life when I’ve looked at success and thought “that’s not for me”. There’s a host of reasons as to why that may have been thought but I’ve dismantled that belief. The only difference between me and the people I look at as sources of inspiration is time, effort, and a bit of luck. Oh, and luck? It’s wild; the more you roll the dice the higher your chance of landing on lucky.

I’m a leader and I have a founder’s mindset. Unpacking this belief entitled building up a resume towards internal congruence. Or, simply put, I have the experience and proof to know that something I /thought/ was a part of me is something I can truly believe in.

Alright. That’s it. 2022 all wrapped up with a nice little bow. Here’s to 2023 and new lessons, changes, and challenges.