1、 Don't flinch lightly. 2、 Keep learning and revising. 3、 Start with your words and deeds, and start with small things. Why we see the opportunity but fail to seize it is because we are hesitating: what method is better, whether there is still a better opportunity, or whether this is an opportunity. The wolf chased the rabbit in the forest. The rabbit saw the wolf and decided to run. It thought, whether to jump on the left leg first or the right leg first, and how to jump better. Before it could finish thinking, it was eaten by the wolf. Simple things are easy to do, complex things are easy to do, simple things are repeated, and so on, are all ways to ensure the effect of doing what you say. 4、 Respect everyone. We will meet many people in our life, but the people we often deal with are very limited. They may only have 50 to 100 people or even less, but everyone will bring us opportunities, everyone may become our customers, everyone may become our friends, so we should respect everyone. Only by putting away the ego all the time can we make ourselves grow more. 5、 It is difficult for ordinary people. Why so many people in this world are mediocre and mediocre all their lives is because they have a habitual thinking, "why should I do this", "why don't others do it", "why should I do it". Some things and opportunities are like a layer of window paper, fleeting, but some opportunities are like stones that look hot on the surface, but are actually in normal temperature, just red. 6、 Keep hungry. If we want to have a healthy body and a healthy career prospect, we must have a sense of hunger and never be satisfied. When you feel that life is good, just have a rest and enjoy the fun of life. After that, you need to get up and run quickly. 7、 Don't make close friends with negative people. If a person always complains and always says that this is no good, that is no good, this can't be done, that can't be done, don't deal with him less. Our goal is to improve ourselves, to surpass ourselves, and to make us more successful. You can hardly learn anything positive from a negative person. 8、 Take responsibility bravely. There are many opportunities in the world, but one reason why many people dare not catch is that they are afraid of being hot. A person in a team can only be trusted because he dares to take responsibility; It is because we dare to take responsibility that we can show value; It is because of the courage to take responsibility that more and more incompetent people will say that anyway, if he carries it, we will just listen to him. Let him lead us. This talent has unique leadership value. It is the irresponsible people who set off the greatness of responsibility, and it is they who give opportunities to the responsible people. If you want to get the satisfaction and happiness that ordinary people can't get, you have to bear the responsibility that ordinary people don't want to bear. 9、 Transaction classification and focus processing. Keep a clear head, form the habit of classifying affairs, immediately decompose and deal with important and urgent things, continue to deal with important but not urgent things, and deal with urgent but not important things at every turn. 10、 Be calm and bold. When the sky falls, we can shrink our heads, cry, hide and hide, but the sky is still falling, so it's useless to be surprised. Even if the sky falls, we don't have any way, then we have to try to carry it first. Only by carrying it first can we calm down and think about the solution carefully.

Before answering what you are suitable for, please answer the following two questions: 1、 Who am I? This problem baffles many people. We have lived so long without knowing who we are? 2、 What do I like to do? Maybe you've been busy, but please stop a little and listen to your inner voice. What do I like to do? Jinn's answer: the ultimate satisfaction of life is to do what you like to do, and be recognized by everyone, and make achievements in this regard. To achieve this process, you may need to pay attention to:

People will encounter great and small tribulations and misfortunes in their life. No matter who they are, they can't escape the tease of the God of fate. However, it is these tribulations and misfortunes that have forged our character, increased our wisdom, led us to understand the true meaning of life and helped us to succeed in our career. As Buddha Sakyamuni said, "all Buddhas take suffering as their good teacher in ten directions and three lifetimes." A life without pain is a dull life. Happiness without pain is boring and cheap. Only when the symphony of life is equipped with painful bass can it become a complete movement of cadence. If a person's life is too smooth, it is a kind of misfortune. Frustration is our great teacher. It is also the most precious wealth. It will make people think of not a desperate situation, but a ladder rope when they encounter a cliff. As the saying goes, "since ancient times, success is more difficult." In our struggle for our career, we can't avoid the injury of frustration and jealousy. Jealousy is a corrosive agent, which can destroy a career or a person's life prospects, but it is also a catalyst, which can also provide us with an opportunity to succeed. Monk Jianzhen of the Tang Dynasty suffered a lot for spreading Dharma in Japan, but he was finally successful in his sixth eastward voyage. Master Xuanzang traveled thousands of miles, experienced hardships, and finally retrieved the Sutra from the state of Tianzhu. Frustration is like adversity, and adversity is sometimes the way to success. Buddha said, "adversity is to increase the upper edge." British scholar Beverly Ritchie also said: "people's best work is often done under adverse circumstances. Mental pressure, even physical pain, can become a spiritual driving force." A failure is a major test of life, and treating failure well is the ladder of our success. As Balzac said, "adversity is the stepping stone of genius, the baptism of believers, the priceless treasure of capable people, and the bottomless abyss of the weak." Greenia, the famous inventor of Grignard reagent, was idle and ignorant in his youth. At a banquet, a countess impolitely accused him, "please stand away. I hate Playboy like you blocking people's sight." This sentence made greenia lose face and deeply hurt his heart, but greenia did not sink, but said goodbye to her parents and went to Lyon To study hard. During his study, greenia developed a strong interest in chemistry. After thousands of hard experiments, he finally invented an important chemical reagent. In view of his great contributions to science, the Royal Swedish Academy of Sciences awarded him the Nobel Prize in chemistry in 1921. Shortly after the news came out, greenia received a congratulatory letter from the countess with "I will always love you". "When the water hits the stone, it will sound, and when people are excited, their ambition will be great." I remember French writer montrand once said, "it is a great thing to succeed in the contempt of others, because it proves that you have defeated not only yourself, but also others." Turning pressure into motivation and challenges into opportunities is the morality of a aspiring person. The real strong can see the rainbow in the storm of thunder and lightning. Bacon, the great philosopher, said, "miracles are often born in bad luck." Success is the result of pursuit and struggle, but success is not always under the brilliant aura, but more in the scattered lights. One autumn night, Thales, an ancient Greek philosopher, was walking on his way home, looking up at the sunny starry sky and thinking. Unexpectedly, he stepped empty and fell into a deep pit beside the road. Because the pit was too deep for him to climb out, he had to shout for help while waiting. When the passer-by pulled him out of the pit, Thales endured the pain, and the first sentence was "it's going to rain tomorrow". After hearing this, the passer-by laughed and said sarcastically, "you can't even make the underground road well, what day do you still study?" At that time, Thales was already a great astronomer and meteorologist, but many of his views were not accepted by any era. But the next day, it really rained heavily. Two thousand later, German scientist Hegel said a famous saying after listening to the story: "only those who always lie in the pit and never look up to the sky will not fall into the pit." The song of scientific struggle is not poetic. Many amazing discoveries and great ideas are difficult flowers in thorns. Mr. Lu Xun once said, "the first monkey to stand up will be bitten to death by his companions. Creative things are often excluded, suppressed and even temporarily strangled because he is different from the old things people are used to, but finally more monkeys stand up, while those monkeys who bite their companions will crawl underground forever." The golden grains of success are filtered from the failed sand. The flash of truth will appear brighter under the background of fallacy. At the entrance of science, like the entrance of hell, the road to success always goes through ups and downs. Almost all human inventions and creations have experienced countless times of pain and failure. Many winners have an experience of crawling in the dark, and sometimes they are lonely and helpless, Like a tenacious snail crawling hard on the trail, they finally saw the light and bred success and a new era from a dark place where they could not see any hope. Newton, a great scientist, told us: "winners often succeed from sticking to the last five minutes." Every striver desires success, but not everyone can succeed. You may fail if you struggle, but you will never succeed if you don't struggle. Failure and success are mixed, and pain and joy coexist. This is the universal truth. Former US President Lincoln once said, "I want to succeed and fail, but I never want to give up." The key to success is to believe in yourself and have the courage to try. In a sense: hitting the rocks is not necessarily a warrior, and failure is not necessarily a hero. In our lifelong struggle, failure often happens. The ancients said, "failure is the mother of success." Astronomer Kepler said, "failure is the start on the road to brilliant fantasy." greet failure with a smile and treat success in competition with indifference. The winner will always belong to those who have experienced countless failures. I remember a successful person said, "on the road of life, if you don't have the patience to wait for success, then you have to face failure with a lifetime of patience." Every failure is the footprints leading to success, and every wrong discovery will lead us to the right path. There are no mountains in the world that cannot be crossed, and some are only temporary setbacks and failures. But as long as we dare to adhere to and summarize the lessons, the milestone of success will show us how to take steps. If you can take strength as a seed, then continuing to struggle is the vast fertile soil for its growth, Edison said, "the most obvious sign of great people is that they all have a strong will. No matter how the environment changes, their original intentions and hopes will not change at all." Helen, an American educator, once said, "when a person feels a force pushing you to soar, you should never crawl." Dickens, a famous British writer, once said a famous saying: "tenacious perseverance can conquer any mountain in the world."

Miss Li is a new girl I know. She looks like Sister Lotus. She thinks she has all kinds of feelings. She dares to chase any man, and she dares to pick up a conversation with any big guy. She often makes jokes when she is crazy about flowers. In the circle of friends, she is a clown. Just like chenhantian's treatment in Kangxi is coming, teasing and humiliating her is a regular entertainment for everyone. It is said that she is the absolute focus of every friend gathering. Even if she is not here, 80% of the topics are about her, because she is so wonderful that she can always provide fresh talk. For example, she got married in a flash, went to the university to give a speech, and became a best friend with a famous lady You never know what she can do next. You don't know whether she automatically blocks the negative news or treats it as a kind of jealousy when people treat her as a joke. No matter how venomous people may be to her, she will always live in her fairyland like fairy tale world. The mantra is often "look like me and look good in everything", "only I dump men, no men dump me", "customers have to throw money at me, and I can't help it" You think she's bragging. She's really bragging. She used to be a political reporter at a newspaper, but later resigned and started a consulting company. In the third year of last year, her business volume has reached more than 13 million. Why should a 27 year old girl? She said that this year she was going to achieve 30million yuan. Although everyone laughed at this figure, they all knew that she could probably do it. She reminds me of a senior sister. Elder martial sister has beautiful facial features and a strong figure. With a height of 158CM and a weight of 132 kg, he also likes to wear a transparent tight jacket and lace miniskirt. He feels that his arms and thighs can burst the material at any time, which makes people look creepy. Her self-evaluation is: "my appearance has concentrated the advantages of linqingxia and Maggie Cheung, so I have been a school flower since I was a child. There are too many people chasing me. I dare not dress up too charming for fear that more men will fall in love with me." Elder martial sister, you didn't wear sexy underwear. We women all over the world thank you. At that time, we all laughed behind her back that she should take medicine. It turns out that we should take the medicine. When senior sister was in graduate school, she had to go to Taiwan to attend an academic conference with her tutor. The tutor was a very gentle old man. She was ashamed to refuse, so she took her there. Then, the senior sister settled down with a professor from NTU. The professor sent an invitation letter to the senior sister, inviting her to visit NTU for a year. Senior sister went to Taiwan, met a French professor, and went directly to a French university for a year. We thought that elder martial sister was going to succeed and become the real wife of a French professor. They fell in love with a Swiss handsome boy. They saw a picture of the handsome boy in the Q group. A group of girls were so jealous that they vomited blood. We comforted ourselves that the handsome guy was just a novelty and would break up soon. However, they got married. The handsome guy is the "rich second generation", and the elder martial sister gave birth to a pair of half blood twins. The elder martial sister is preparing to introduce a high-end European home furnishing brand to China recently. The recently posted photos on her microblog are still those five big and three thick figures wrapped in Chanel's suit. Next to her is her handsome husband with a spoiled face. Oh, I forgot to say that my husband is 8 years younger than her. Why? First, because of their blind self-confidence, they move forward bravely and set no limits on anything. When Ms. Li was a financial reporter, she dared to interview celebrities and other senior journalists who felt that they couldn't make it and gave up. In the end, she would always be able to handle it. Where does this confidence come from? It comes from a kind of self-confidence from the heart. Just like human beings in infancy, they feel that they are the masters of the world. Miss Li often says, how do you know if you don't try? The same is true of elder martial sister. It is said that she was just a freshman. At that time, everyone thought that professors were superior. Who dares to chat with professors? She dares. After class, other students rushed to the canteen to get food. She went to chat with the professor in the name of asking questions, and even asked the professor to go shopping with her. That was an old Marxist Leninist lady. Everyone was shocked. But the elder martial sister said, "why not? Professors are also human beings. They are also eager to get along with young people." Second, self-esteem is a stumbling block to success. Miss Li said that when she was a child, her family lived on the first floor of the street. Every time she made a mistake, her father punished her by kneeling at the door of her house, so that passers-by could see it. Therefore, she didn't care about her self-esteem for a long time. When we do something, we often think too much and imagine all kinds of bad results: what if the other party doesn't like me? What should I do if I disturb or trouble the other party? What if the other party refuses me? Miss Li disdains this: what does it matter to be rejected? I have nothing to lose. I found 10 people, 8 of them refused me, and 2 of them agreed, and I made money. Third, because the goal is clear, they don't care about other people's opinions at all. They have strong executive power and can always achieve their goals. On the night of having dinner with Miss Li, on the surface, she ran the train and said all kinds of strange things. But if you sort it out a little, you will find that in fact, she is quite logical. All her wonderful comments revolve around three themes. First of all, she is very good, and her company is also very good. She has got a lot of big customers. Why do you say this? Because there is a vice president of a foreign enterprise who is her potential customer, she should explain her strength; (www.lz13.cn) Secondly, she half jokingly introduced her business to the vice president, said what she could do for the other party, and persuaded the other party to sign a contract with her. The vice president didn't take it seriously, and she didn't mind; The best thing is that she seems to get the vice president's information in a small talk. She learned that the former newspaper boss of the vice president was a college classmate in the same dormitory. She called the newspaper boss on the spot and made an appointment to have tea together at the weekend. With this relationship, the vice president was basically eaten by her Miss Li will never care how others laugh at her. She only cares if she can do what she wants to do. This is also my elder martial sister's strong point. In those years, she won the escort quota by making good relations with professors and counselors. Her classmates attacked her shameless, but she didn't care. "Yes, I shameless, so I got what I wanted. You shameful, so you have nothing. You deserve it. Either learn from me, or continue to pretend to be high minded and scold me for my fart." What I want to say is that those who are blind, confident and thick skinned are really powerful people. They don't care about others and can let themselves go. In this world, the last thing you can get is the people who were treated as jokes.

Success is to overcome all kinds of difficulties and obstacles and perverse actions that try to prevent us from living happily and happily. There has never been a smooth life or a career accomplished overnight. The purpose of life is to win one victory after another; Get success again and again - so that we can breathe freely, smile comfortably, sing happily and enjoy ourselves in the difficult life. Indeed, no matter what kind of ideal, what kind of pursuit, what kind of career, almost all people can persist for twoorthree days. Most people can persist for twoorthree months. Many people can persist for twoorthree years... But the final winners, without exception, are those who bravely and tenaciously persist in the end even if they are sad, clench their teeth, and harden their scalp - they almost all have reached the other shore of their own ideal victory sooner or later. The result of persisting in the end, even if it is a crushing failure, but also because of enthusiasm and persistence, makes people "hit the wall" as soon as possible and learn the lessons of failure as soon as possible. From then on, they will not repeat the mistakes in ignorance. Sticking to the end, of course, will pay a heavy, rare, and sometimes even vague price. Because this is a world of conservation of mass (energy): happiness is destined to be exchanged with pain; Flowers are destined to be watered with tears... The hardships paid are always proportional to the sweetness of the harvest. Being full of enthusiasm, hope, joy and smile, having fun with a clear conscience and being natural and unrestrained with a sense of security... Is the most ordinary and ordinary reward given to them by life. At the cost of patience, restraint and hard work and sweat, they bought themselves beautiful happiness and joy. As a matter of fact, they have always insisted on themselves to the end, for their great glory and happiness in life, but only unexpectedly, they have obtained greater glory and happiness.

I used to think that actors are a magical species. They are naturally versatile. A person who can act seems to be able to sing, dance, folk art, sketches, musical instruments, crosstalk, and all 18 kinds of martial arts. He can stand still under any kind of spotlight. It was not until I heard wangluodan talk about his experience of learning dance that I found that, except for those "other people's children" who were born to be angry with us, in fact, there are more "stupid people" who lack talent in all walks of life. She said, "I stood in the middle of the dance room for the first time when I was 6 years old. My mother walked me through the door and gave me a hard look. The information was huge, including - my child, I was numbed by your wild behavior from childhood to childhood, but I will soon go to primary school. I hope you will make your last attempt to be a good girl who knows how to dance and stick. My mother loves you. If you don't dance well, you will eat vegetarian vegetables with your father tonight and watch the new dance Go to bed after listening to the broadcast. Do you understand? " "I understand, so my steps are very heavy. The teacher taught us to turn horizontally, and all the children can rotate according to the track. Only I can turn like a headless fly. There were about a dozen students in the classroom. They laughed and bent over. This' laughter 'suddenly shattered my fantasy of talent. Therefore, from the age of 6, I knew that once I danced, I would hear laughter like applause. At that time, I gave up learning to dance." I asked her, "when you were admitted to the Beijing Film Academy, didn't you want to show your art exam?" She was a little proud. "I was admitted to the Beijing Film Academy at the age of 17. During the art examination, most of the female students did choose dance, ballet, ethnic, classical, even jazz and hip-hop. I was the only one who sang a rock song paranoia. At that time, I thought I was cool. Later, in the school's presentation performance, the student sister danced a duet" cradle on the stage, and my admiration ran through the whole adolescence. " Her words reminded me of those students who achieved particularly good math scores in my high school days. They also admired them and became the most profound brand in my youth. Maybe everyone has an example at the bottom of their heart, who used to be the one we all want to be in our dreams. I was curious, "you should be able to choose your favorite life and role now. It doesn't matter whether you can dance or not?" She laughed, "I couldn't overcome my desire for dancing. Although I didn't have talent, I went to the dance rehearsal hall and tried again. Ha ha, I still couldn't do it. It was more difficult than I thought. I insisted on dancing for a month, but the movements were still not standard, the coordination was poor, and I often couldn't keep up with the rhythm. I confirmed that I would never have a chance to meet the standards of professional dancers. However, I laughed with my teammates and showed in the dance group. This was the greatest happiness." "I really don't have talent, but I can be better. I am such a stupid and hard-working self. Even, everyone can't be an excellent person, but can be a better self." The last sentence really poked me. Our current popular culture is particularly intolerant of "stupid self" and "excellent others", especially those who live a less outstanding and happy life. Since ancient times, our aesthetic orientation has always been: "where there is a will, there is a way to accomplish things. When there is a will, there will be a way to sink the boat. Twelve hundred Qinchuan will eventually belong to Chu. The painstaking efforts of the people and the heaven will live up to their expectations. They will endure hardships and taste the gall. Three thousand Yuejia can swallow Wu." In our philosophy of existence, there are too many strong people thinking. Even in the thinking mode of success, the meaning of the word "effort" has been misinterpreted - effort does not mean doing your best, but rather surpassing others, becoming the best strong person in a certain field, and comparing others. Therefore, we believe in "not making excuses for failure, but finding methods for success", "there is nothing that cannot be done, only those who can not be done", and our "efforts" are too strong to win or lose. However, not everyone's ideal is to become an outstanding person, and not everyone has the opportunity to become a strong person - genius and excellent guys are always the limited edition of life. Most of the time, we can only make "Einstein's third bench" - that although ugly, it is better than the first two. This wise man with the largest brain capacity also has no all-round talent. He still has a weakness, and his loveliness is not that he has worked hard to make up for his weaknesses and live a painless life, but that he still maintains his childishness and wants to make a little better looking bench, which is better than the first two. This is the true meaning of efforts. Even the most inconspicuous morning glory has its own unique beauty when it opens. It will never become a popular peony, but it still enjoys the process of blooming. Not everyone's dream is to live in a big house, earn a lot of money and stand out. Many people are enjoying their own little happiness and calmly become happy ordinary people. Those who try their best but don't shine, and those who work hard but don't succeed, still deserve applause. A horse named "Chunli", which has never won, is a Japanese idol. Chunli has lost every battle since she made her debut at Kochi Racecourse in November, 1998. For six years, Chunli has been running hard, but has never won the first. At the end of 2003, after Chunli set a record of 100 consecutive defeats, NHK TV broadcast an album of "losing superstar" on the evening news, and Chunli instantly became a well-known star. In order to give Chunli a taste of winning the championship, on march22,2004, Wufeng, the most popular knight in Japan, served as Chunli's rider. On that day, the audience had to queue up for two hours to enter the arena, buy horse tickets and various souvenirs. Even the prime minister was paying attention to the results of the horse race. There was no miracle. Chunli still ranked No. 10 among the 11 horses. This was her 106th failure, but it did not hurt the enthusiasm of the audience. Many people also proposed to help Chunli make a film and let her be the "heroine" again. Why is a losing horse so obsessed? Perhaps many people have seen the epitome of their own life from her - although they have failed all the time, they are still running. "Win" is a skill. Knowing that "win" can not be won, they are willing not to give up and strive for better results for themselves. It is open-minded, and it is the real meaning of the word "effort". Just like each of us, we can't be excellent others, but we can be better ourselves.

Some time ago, I saw a well-known media company recruiting a planning manager for the direction of TV dramas. The requirement was "love watching TV dramas, know the TV dramas of recent years, and know their directors, screenwriters, producers, actors and other information." Every time I see the recruitment information, I will subconsciously take my seat in order to fill the vacancy. After thinking about it carefully, I found that I didn't know anything except "love watching TV dramas", being familiar with the protagonist's face and name, and knowing oneortwo well-known directors! Later, I transferred this information to a good friend. She is a veteran TV drama fan at the bone ash level. Since childhood, she moved a small bench to watch black-and-white TV. From longing to journey to the west, to meteor garden, to the legend of Zhen Huan and Langya bang, family ethics, youth idols, palace fights, official history and crossing... Her eyes are all inclusive. When we were in college, our other friends always shook their heads at her, who would follow the drama whenever we had time. According to the words my mother scolded me from childhood, "I wish I could get into TV". It was simply too unproductive. Sure enough, my friend saw this recruitment information and said that these requirements were a piece of cake for her. She despised me and taught me a lesson. It is a living history of the development of world TV series! In my eyes of "worshiping the great God", she left the sentence "watching the drama" and disappeared. She had deep achievements and fame, leaving only me who loved learning and thinking. From small to large, we have been taught that "watching TV" is such a bad habit that we can't improve our academic performance, let alone hope to make a living from it. In the few after-school life, this is the most time-consuming thing! However, if you not only kill time and entertainment, but focus on learning and research in this field, you will become a "TV expert", and the accumulation over the years will become a unique knowledge board. It is worth mentioning that although this good friend always likes to pursue dramas, her academic performance and working status are excellent. When she just graduated, she joined an unknown department store group and worked as a trainee for less than 3000 yuan a month. At that time, her salary was the lowest among our group of friends. We even felt that this position was not worthy of her education and ability. But the girl said that she was going to engage in this industry, so she never complained whether she learned how to kill fish in the fresh food department of the supermarket or ran around after the head of the shopping mall. Now, the girl is still in this company, but she has been promoted from a management trainee to an assistant to the operation director, and her salary has also leaped by rocket. When we chatted with some good friends, some people always complained that the traditional industry was bad, offline business was difficult to do, and some people always wanted to change jobs. However, the girl said happily: "there are many powerful predecessors in our company. I am not half of them. How can I say that the environment is bad? I am not good enough." You see, she focuses on this, her heart is firm, and she never swings from side to side. She is especially energetic, so she never sighs under the influence of the environment. I once did a series of "happy life" reports, and I found the big and small happy people in this city. There is a guy who likes animation and works for a famous advertising company. He uses his spare time to make props to play Cosplay and sits in a hard seat with his bag on his back to participate in the diffuse exhibition. His family was very worried that he didn't want to find a girlfriend. They told him to play something he didn't understand. Later, he quit his job, set up a studio, and became the diffuse exhibition planner of the city. Another girl who liked cloth dolls since childhood finally became a master of hand-made cloth and opened her own training studio. There is also a pair of rural brothers who like music. They secretly taught themselves musical instruments in the opposition of their parents. Finally, they used potatoes and pumpkins to make "vegetable instruments" and appeared on the China's got talent show. In this world, there are always things that seem "useless" but eventually become "useful". Those who can successfully turn "useless" into "great use" and "no" into "yes" have a common quality: "focus". The guy who likes animation has a complete history of Chinese and Japanese animation in his mind. He learns to draw, looks for materials everywhere, and even studies mechanics in order to make good props. He often worked late at night to make props, but never delayed his normal work. Finally, he brought the work experience of advertising companies to the animation industry. The girl who likes cloth dolls learned sewing, color matching and design by herself. The two rural brothers who like music have a unique idea. They have experimented on the most common vegetables time and again, making pumpkins, potatoes and green onions sing. When they talk about their fields, they will talk and their eyes will glow. Love makes them attracted to these things, and concentration makes them forget themselves and give full play to their potential. There are too many temptations in this world. When you are doing something, there are always other people and things to disturb your mind. Perhaps it is the parents' complaint about "what is the future"; Perhaps, it is the cold shoulder of "how can you be different from everyone" from your friends; Or maybe it is the tangle and struggle about the future in my heart. However, when doing the same thing, some people become leaders, while others become deserters. Some people eventually become great, and some people accomplish nothing. When you are wavering and clinging to your feet, please believe in the power of "concentration". Concentration, derived from natural love, is a kind of good moral character honed after the day. Concentration is to know clearly what you are doing without being confused or confused. Concentration, like the water drop through the stone, silence is full of power. Everyone is shouting to be a "firm hearted" person, but how many people can really "focus on nothing"?

A few days ago, a girl named Rou walked into my psychological counseling room and said she wanted to talk about the pressure of her studies. In fact, it is more appropriate to say that it is pressure than disgust with the major. Rou is a Chinese major in the first year of graduate school this year. In the past few months, rou has been depressed and complaining almost every day. In her opinion, the Chinese department is at odds with itself everywhere, and professional teachers are boring; Homework is not difficult, but because I don't like it, I am too lazy to write it; Group work can be pushed. She is always the one who contributes the least in the team, which makes the members of the group dissatisfied. Rou said, "I know it's not good. I'm the one who wastes. But I just can't force myself to like it." She studied politics at the undergraduate level and then moved to the Chinese department at the graduate level. Rou told me: "in fact, I prefer politics. I have loved it since I was a child. After the college entrance examination, although my parents wanted me to read economics, I still insisted on reading politics. My parents didn't beat me." I was puzzled and asked her, "since I like it so much, why should I change my post-graduate stage?" "Because I didn't learn well!" Soft answered frankly. "My undergraduate grades are medium. If I choose Bao Yan, I will have to meet with those students who are better at learning than me day by day at the graduate stage. They have pressed me hard enough at the undergraduate stage. I want to change my environment. At that time, I thought, maybe I like politics, but I have more talent in Chinese!" Listening to Rou's description, I suddenly had a picture in my mind: two children aged 7 or 8, with childish faces but a serious look, sitting opposite each other in a game of chess. One of them, seeing that he was about to lose, angrily pushed the pieces on the plate to avoid facing the failed outcome. In fact, what's the difference between Rou's move to the Chinese department when she didn't learn well in her favorite political major and the 7 - or 8-year-old children? Nothing more, they dare not face failure! two Indeed, compared with success, the word failure is not very pleasant. Especially when failure is associated with intelligence and ability, it makes people feel a fear of "turning over". As a result, many people would rather pretend to be relaxed in front of others and make fun of their "late stage of lazy cancer", rather than admit that they actually worked hard late into the night. The reason is that once you fail, you can use "I didn't work hard" as an excuse, so that you won't lose face when others say "it's still so bad to work so hard". We have more or less such friends around us, or ourselves, is one of them. Playing cards together, you can only win but not lose. If you lose, you can either sigh or simply turn around and leave; When working on projects in the company, always only those with the ability to do so will be accepted, and the slightest difficulty will be pushed to others; If he catches up with being criticized by the leader, he will try every means to explain and blame the mistakes on his colleagues You may vomit a few bad words and feel that they are glass hearted and can't afford to lose. In fact, in their hearts, there is always a voice reminding them: you can't lose, you can't be bad, you can't fail. As one of my visitors said to me, I have hated a job for many years, but I have been afraid to give up. I am not for salary or development. I am only afraid that if I change it, I will be laughed at if I fail to do it well. I asked, "is it the end of the world for you to fail in changing jobs?" He smiled and said, "that's true." Such people may hide in their comfort zone and avoid many opportunities for failure, but they also successfully bypass the possibility of success again and again. As Austrian psychiatrist Adler said in his book "inferiority and Transcendence": "a person who just wants to avoid difficulties will inevitably lag behind others." Who doesn't get up and pat the soil while wrestling, sum up the lessons, and then move on without stopping? You are so afraid of losing. How can you cultivate the skills that lead to success if you hide quietly in the same place and haven't even seen the scenery on the road? No one can advance all his life. When you meet classmates, colleagues and friends who are better than you and have better talent than you, try to bend down and lower your attitude, and ask them how they achieved today's success, which is far more useful than hiding and deceiving yourself and others. Yes, you will not always be right, successful and glorious. No one can! three In fact, many people who are afraid of failure and can only win but not lose are narcissistic. You say, narcissism is not all self conceited, always arrogant, full of pride? Why are those people mentioned above somewhat timid and frustrated, as if they just want to hide in a narrow space that "will not fail"? In fact, there are two kinds of narcissism. One is self expansion, look down on others, feel that you are unique, and everything is the best. We call it "cheeky narcissism". The other is just the opposite. They are depressed, shy, afraid of being the focus of the public, and are often overly sensitive to other people's reactions. We call it "thin skinned narcissism". "Thin skinned narcissists" will somehow think that they are the center of the world and should belong to the top of the mountain. Therefore, once they are mediocre and incompetent, they feel that the world is gray. Neither the "thick skinned narcissists" nor the "thin skinned narcissists" can present a person's true self-image. The former exaggerates and the latter belittles. Also because of this excessive debasement, other people's eyes are not good, in his view, it is very. This is why it is more difficult for him to bear failure. If you are also a "thin skinned narcissist", I suggest you say to yourself "I'm really not that good" in your heart rather than building confidence. Just don't forget to add the word "temporary" when saying this. I'm just not that good for the time being. On the one hand, he pulled himself from the imaginary altar of "perfection" back to reality and admitted that he was flawed and imperfect; On the other hand, give yourself room to breathe and grow, so as not to take "failure" too seriously. Yes, you will fail, you are not so good, so what?! Who doesn't find the way to success after countless failures.