“For every shadow, no matter how deep, is threatened by morning light.”

-Izzi in “The Fountain”

What matters MOST to me in this life? I often reflect of when i first had kids and i promised myself i would always be involved in their lives, attend the events, and be PRESENT.

This exact thinking rolls over into answering the question of what matters most to ME in this life- beyond my children.

It is so easy to get lost in other things. Whatever feeds my dopamine will direct my entire day- if i let it.

Money, Careers, Substances, Partying, Sex, Gambling, Flashing Lights, Loud Music, Adrenaline Rushes. Soaring my Dopamine levels through the roof until I literally burn out and crash from it. Its so appealing and addictive to ‘seek’ these activities.

Fun? Sure- absolutely- but….. do they hold up in the court of my life at the end? Do they offer Rich Fullfillment in my Heart and Soul?

The easiest way i have found DAILY to decide how i want to spend my time in my life is to imagine being 80 or 90 years old, on my death bed, and reflect on how i spent my time- and if i would be happy about it.

Did i pursue a career and completely miss out on all the time spent with my family?
Did i become rich and famous but never had and REAL friendships?
Did i make millions in the stock market but was never invited to my relatives Christmas parties?

This short, 5 minute or less practice, tells me EXACTLY how I PERSONALLY want to spend my day- and what will matter MOST to ME on MY Deathbed.

The answer is: How and Who I Spent my time with.

The quote at the top is in relation to this:

MY ANSWER- that you just read- comes from someone, me, that never thought i needed ANYONE in this life. Resented humans, planned to live how i wanted and die alone- never wanting anyones help, not needing friends, full of loathing of family and apathy for life.

I am grateful that the Light has evicted the very long, dark, and deep shadow i had casted over my own life- and allowed me to see what really matters to me.